Typical Texas Bluebonnet Pictures

Wordless Wednesday

Here are a few of my favorite pictures of the kids together:

 



5 on Friday

I am linking up with Darci from The Good Life blog, for 5 on Friday!  I have been reading them for a few months, found a few great blogs to follow, and so now I am ready to take the plunge and link up myself.

ONE My house right now is a crazy unorganized mess, and it stresses me out very much.  But I have yet to do anything about it.  I am letting it be for now, because I know that if I try to start organizing, the craziness will only get worse in the process.  Cartoons for the boy, nap for the baby, and blogging for mommy wins over the mess.

My house isn't this bad, thank goodness

TWO I seriously have gotten bad at sabotaging myself when it comes to eating better.  I eat great all day, then at night I gorge myself on ice cream (like the whole pint of Blue Bell cookies and cream (it was SO good, I just could not stop)) or candy, really anything sweet.  I am not sure how to control my actions.  I will tell myself in the morning that I will do better than the day before and most days I find I do worse.  I have put up notes for myself that I thought would help for visual motivation.  But when I am brushing my teeth at night, I just feel so deflated and depressed with myself that I couldn't overcome my weakness.  (More on this in another blog post).

THREE The kids are counting down the days till Spring Break (only 7 left), because my mom and possibly my oldest brother are coming into town!!  I seriously cannot wait!!  I am hoping we have some great fun and that loads of memories will be made.

FOUR I recently had to upgrade my iphone to the IOS 7 for a new app I wanted to add (Mint personal finance), and I hate it!  That is all.

FIVE Paisley is growing up way too fast!  She is almost 6 months, and I want time to slow down.  She is my last and I have been savoring every moment, but I still feel like I am missing out.  She is eating fruits and veggies, she is sitting, she is rolling, and she is jumping in her bouncer.  Before I know it, she will be walking and talking.  Please some one tell me how to make time stand still!!

 

Naptime=Playtime 4 Cloud Dough

Brayden and I are having so much fun with our naptime=playtime activities. 

As I was searching pinterest for new ideas for my Indoor Fun and Games board, I came across one of my new favorite blogs for fun ideas, Kara's Classroom.  I first found her post on cloud dough and then searched through her blog and I cannot wait to try more of her ideas.

Cloud dough was easy to make, and Brayden had lots of fun playing with it. 

To make cloud dough all you need is 7 cups of flour, 1 cup of vegetable oil and a big container to put it in.  *I wish we would have had a bigger container, but our little one worked just fine.

To start, we gathered our flour, oil, container, and a towel to sit on.  Brayden helped me count and measure out the cups of flour and then mix in the oil. 

He played for awhile with just the dough till we were interrupted by Paisley who wanted to join in the fun.  She started off in her bouncer, but she did not want to stay there.  I put her in the bumbo and gave her a cookie cutter to play with.  Brayden loved trying to make the cookie cutter shapes in the dough.  Next time, I want to come up with more things for him to play with in the dough, even though his hands and the cookie cutters worked just fine. 

After the big girls got home from school, Brayden told them what he had played with and they wanted to play too.  Even my girls liked it, and this is why I want a bigger container.

Overall, the cloud dough was a HUGE success and I cannot wait to get it out again!

Any suggestions on what else to play with in the cloud dough?

Baby Blues

Sorry I have been MIA from the blog the past few weeks, I haven't been in much of a writing mood.  I have been dealing with some personal things. 

I have been very down, blah, and just not feeling like myself since Paisley was born.  I have been constantly overwhelmed with all the kids by myself.  I yell way to much at the big girls and strain our relationship greatly most days, and I let Brayden wither away in front of the tv for hours a day, all while feeling stuck on the couch with no energy or enthusiasm to get up and live life.  A lot of days I feel lonely, I overeat, and I sleep horrible, I am just not myself.  I feel trapped in some one else's body.  My mood swings are out of control.  I can go from happy and content to crazy angry and yelling to feeling like crying my eyes out all within a matter of minutes.

I know "baby blues" are always possible after you give birth, but I never thought I would have it.  I am not sure if what I am experiencing is "baby blues" or just really bad hormonal changes due to getting my tubes tied.  I did not feel like this with my other babies, at least not to the extent that I do now.  Doctors are quick to tell you that there is no relation with getting your tubes tied and hormonal changes, but based on my mood, I feel otherwise.  This past week, I finally talked to my doctor about how I have been feeling, and hopefully will be feeling better in a few weeks (praying for sooner).  We agreed the best course of action, in my case, was to go on Lexapro.  I hope it starts to kick in over the next few weeks.  I never thought I would need to be put on something, however, if the medication helps me turn this all around, then so be it.
It has been very hard with 4, much harder than I ever thought it would be.  I never wanted to have 4 kids and I stressed and worried my entire pregnancy, but it was obviously in God's plan for our family and he is never wrong.  I love Paisley and wouldn't change having her for anything in the world.  She makes me smile and I know she will bring so much love and joy to our world that we would be greatly lacking with out her here. 

I was worried about how Brayden would be with her, but he has been amazing with her.  He always wants to hold her and give her kisses; I think he is very proud to be her big brother.  However, he has become increasingly insistent on getting my attention any way necessary, whether that is being overly sweet or throwing mega fits.  Maddi and Ella also love and adore her and constantly want to hold her, and they also try to keep her from crying as much as they can, they are awesome big sisters.

I hope that the medicine kicks in soon so I can get back to feeling like myself with my amazing family.  They deserve so much more than I give to them.

I am sure postpartum isn't overly talked about or that if what I am feeling could be from my tubal, but I wanted to put it out there.  If you are down, I don't think medication should be your first choice, but sometimes it may end up being the best choice.  The main thing is that you keep yourself healthy for your family and talk to your doctor about your feelings sooner rather than later.

Terrific Tuesday #3

• This past Saturday was our last soccer game of the season!  Maddi's team played very hard and the game was a hard played one that ended in a tie.  It was definitely the most exciting game of the season.

• After soccer, we went to Tech's last home game to tailgate.  I am still amazed at how much fun can be had standing in a parking lot!
• Saturday night, we had family movie night and watched Monsters University.  I don't think Brayden moved the whole time it was on.
• We watched Monsters U twice on Sunday!  Brayden is now convinced he is Sully :)
• I found a super cute jacket for a steal from an online garage sale site!  $1 for this baby, hells ya!

 

• Paisley has been sleeping in her crib at night :)  She shares a room with Brayden and he uses a sound machine at night, and I think the noise helps her sleep.  With the heart beat sound playing, she sleeps great!  After I go to bed, she will sleep in the pack and play or with me after her late night feeding, but I am glad that she is sleeping in there some (it's a start).

 

• Brayden is an awesome big brother!  He amazes me everyday with how much he loves her!  Today he watched her like a hawk while the doctor checked her out at her two month checkup.  It was so cute!

I really need to start writing things down during the week, when I sit in front of the computer my mind goes blank to the terrific things that happened early in the week.  This weekly post has made me look at my week different and to find joy in the small things.  I hope you are enjoying them as well.

What are some terrific things that happened to you this past week? 

Wordless Wednesday *Princess and a Pumpkin

I am very sad that we missed our fall tradition of going to a pumpkin patch this year.  I decided yesterday to improvise with the three pumpkins we have and haven't carved.  Yup, we are on top of things this year.  Here is Paisley while Brayden was napping.

 

I love her smile.

I tried to prop her up on the pumpkin and she wasn't having it.

Maybe when she is napping I will try again.

Yawning, not crying.

She was obviously bored taking pictures with the pumpkin.

Terrific Tuesday #1

After my super honest Debbie downer post yesterday, I have to do something different.

I have to make a change from within to make myself get out of this funk!

I have to remind myself what makes ME happy.

I am going to start a weekly post where I am going to find things from the past week that were terrific.  Little things and big things, and all the terrific things in between.  I need to start looking at my days with a positive attitude instead of letting all the negative take over.  I am going to start today.  Terrific Tuesday post number one!

• Saturday Maddi played an amazing soccer game!  She was playing defense, which is not her favorite position to play, but she rocked it!  She was stopping balls from going past her, dribbling the ball and passing up the field really well, throwing in the ball,  and winning the ball from the other team.  I was one proud momma and couldn't stop telling her great she was doing!!  Even better, the whole team played a great and won the game!
• Brayden cracks me up the way he says things.  He says Hollypop for lollypop, sprinkles for the wrinkles he gets in the bath, and he calls Maddi and Ella "the grales" instead of "the girls."  That is all I can think of right now, but I know there are more.
• Gabriella had a hard time on her spelling test the week before last turning letters around and made an 80 something.  This past week, she worked very hard on practicing her words and didn't miss any!  She didn't turn any letters around, and I could tell she worked very hard.
• Paisley is a great baby!  She sleeps really well, especially if we are out and about (the girl LOVES her carseat), and is an overall very happy baby.
• I went to a Moms Group meetup and meet some new ladies.  One had a baby 2 days before I had Paisley and her hubby is also a restaurant manager.  It is weird that I hope we form a great friendship?

I know there is more that made it a great week, but I will stop there for now.

Did you have anything that made it a great week for you?

Funk Funk Funk

I am in a funk!

I am in a stay at home, watch tv and cruise facebook all day kind of funk.

I am in a workout and eat right funk.

I am in a "I don't like my post baby body" funk.

I am in a mom funk.

I am in a wife funk.

I am in a find joy in the small things funk.

I am in a funk!

*The word funk is starting to look funky*

 

I have been in and out of this funk for about 10 months now, I guess it started around the time I found out I was pregnant with number 4.  I did not want a 4th baby, but there was nothing I could change at that point.  I never had a number in my mind of how many kids I wanted, but I felt overwhelmed and stressed the moment I heard I was going to have 4.  I thought I had it figured out with 3.  Two girls and one boy, that was perfect for me, that was my completed family, or so I thought.  God had other plans for me.  I couldn't (and still don't) understand why I am meant to have 4 kids.

Don't get me wrong, I love my kids with every ounce of my being, but lately I am finding it hard to find the joy.

 

I don't laugh like I used to.

I don't love on my older girls like I used to.

I don't engage with Brayden like I should.

I send my kids off to play away from me.

I yell, I am easy aggravated, I roll my eyes,

I am an unhappy mom.

 

I feel like a terrible mom and I feel sorry for my kids.  I find myself thinking that I would not want to have me as a mom.

 

There are good days, where I feel amazing, where I love being a mom to 4, where I find joy in the small things that we do together.  Those moments I try to take a picture of, those moments I put on Instagram and post to facebook, those moments are just a small glimpse into my life.  The funk moments, those don't make the posting cut.

 

I feel terrible knowing that their are women who struggle to get pregnant and want kids with every fiber of their being, and I was so disappointed and unhappy with my situation.  I have to realize that this is my journey and that is just how I felt.

 

I have to find a way to snap out of my funk, to find my zest for life again, to find joy in my kids and my husband, to figure out my destiny in life.

 

*This is a honest post with my honest feelings, please no bashing or being rude!*

 

Halloween PJ Link Up

 

 

Maddison

 

Gabriella

 

My big girls!

Not sure what is going on with Ella's smile.

 

 Paisley is so not happy with out her paci.

 



Brayden being silly with his overly forced smile.

 

Brayden wanted a picture with his big sisters.

Seriously, what is going on with Ella's smile???

How did I get so lucky?

I am linking up with Darci from The Good Life and Meredith from The Tichenor Family!  Please join us in sharing your kiddos in their Halloween PJ's!  

Paisley's Birthday 9-12-13

With Paisley being 4 weeks old yesterday, and turning 1 month officially tomorrow, I thought I would finally upload photos from her birthday!

 

Paisley's due date wasn't till the 24th, but a sonogram on Sept 3rd showed that I had double the amniotic fluid that I was supposed to have.  Normal levels are up to 12 and I was at 24.5!  She was also measuring close to 9 pounds, so my dr. wanted to get her out as soon as we could.  We had the induction scheduled for Sept 12th.

 

My very last pregnant photo!!  I was huge since I had so much extra fluid.

I went in at 7 am to get my induction started.  We got back to my room around 8, and I had my water broken around 9:30. 

  

Waiting to get things going.

Paisley was so ready to meet us, because she was born 4 hours later at 1:36 pm.

 



8 lbs 14 oz and 22 in long



 

 

Chubby Cheeks

 

Proud Papa!

 



Big Bro!

 

 

Grani with the big sisters and brother!

*I will add photos of the girls holding Paisley, but first I need to get them from my hubby!

 

Paisley's Newborn Photos

 

This month has flown by and brought on lots of changes, but they have been worth it!

Happy 1 month sweet girl!